Quote: It just seems to me you two have gotten in a push me-pull you, and you might need to change your tactics, do a 180, give him what he wants. You know your H better than anyone... but you are in a rough place, too.
This is what I've been thinking too. Holdingon, your perspective really made me think. I appreciate that.
What's puzzled me SO much is that we've been doing this a while... and initially H expressed that he needed more from me. Some of this was the MLC/depression/A justification mix. But there was some legitimacy to some of it and I sorted that wheat out and my pursuing helped. And once I got DB and got some grounding instead of flying my the seat of my pants, the cautious pursuit combined with honest comm. and not too much pressure worked better.
So, it's odd to me. My "not wanting it" turned his head around for a good long while... showed him what love is really about, he said. Made him rethink all those assumptions he made.
Now, yes, it's like H is deciding that never happened. And I think I am confused more than any other emotion. Who knows why H high-tailed it? Not me, and maybe not even him.
Pattie, love that poisonous snake image. I'm going to work with that, LOL.
SS, thanks so much for the bit o'sun on this thread. I am feeling lots and lots better - amazing what a few good friends and a bottle of wine will do.
