Back on these forums again

[Mona52]

Thanks OG! There is a lot of things I want changed, fixed and installed, so it is good to hear you were able to climb that mountain, so I have a chance to do it too.

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My interior decorating plans are being sabotaged. I have the most adorable, innocent, lovely, sweet, cute puppy in the world. She follows me from room to room, cries when I leave and refuses to sleep anywhere but in my room. It is actually my D16's dog. I am a cat person. But my D16 PROMISED she would take care of the puppy and did nothing, so I kinda inherited her.

When I walk out the door, this sweet little angel on earth has been tearing up my new plants all over the living room. I think the only reason my paintings are safe is because she cant reach them. The blanket gets pulled from the sofa, and I still have not found a way to keep her out of the trash. This has only started happening this last week.

I can hear you all saying "buy a create!" Yep, it looks like I might have to.

No news to report with H. After 5 days of NC by me, I sent him a text yesterday. I wanted to go out after work and I had no way to get my S to soccer practice. So my H said he would drive him.

But my brilliant son decided to save time by walking to H 's house? So my H could not find him when he got to my house. He searched every room, which is good. Because he had to have seen that I threw out a ton of junk. Anyway, my H actually called me and we spoke. It was weird to hear his voice, and I hung up the phone as fast as I could. His voice still grated on my nerves.

He never checked back to see if S was ever found, but I did not expect him to. I texted him at 11:00pm last night to tell him what happened, but he did not reply and I did not expect him to.

My M seems to be more hopeless every day. I am completely OK with not contacting him for a week or more. I feel real anger towards him, and I have been thinking what life would be like with husband number 2. Will he be blond? Will he know how to use a hammer? Does he have a house on the river?

Thoughts of a new R with a new person fill my spare time more than thoughts of fixing this M. That being said, I still think about and focus on my H way more than what is healthy.

I splurged yesterday and me and my D15 got our hair done. My H, and my 3 kids all get their hair done at a salon, but I have not had my hair done in a salon in 20 years. To be honest, I always got one of the kids to cut it, then I would fix it when they were done. Now my hair is layered and I look 10 years younger!

After the salon, I dropped my D15 off at the bowling alley with her friends, and she was asked out to the homecoming dance by a boy she really likes. He made her this huge poster that said something like, "Don't gutter at the dance, bowl a strike by going with me." and he made some kind of clay design thing on the poster. It was so cute.

While she was bowling I took D16 and S out to eat and we had so much fun, then, when we picked up D15 from the bowling alley, she had just started a new game, so me and the other 2 rented a lane and played ourselves. I laughed so hard!

I know I need to be focusing on some R goals. I know MWD likes 3 small attainable goals, things I can see some progress on in a week or two, things that are action goals, but I am not 100% sure what I want at the moment.

I had goals of him being in some sort of contact with the kids a few times a week. I'm forcing it, but so far it has been happening.

Now I need another goal that will show I am moving in the right direction. I think I want to try a bigger goal. I want to have one phone call, once a week, about the children, AND i want to find a way to not be angry or annoyed when I hear him. That is really 2 different goals, and that is good enough for now.