[BrightFuture]

Hello there, fellow DBers. I feel like I might be posting to myself again though , since there is not much to report.

I’ve been busy for the last couple of weeks, working overtime, plus this side gig that I have. I was so exhausted by the end of last week that I was falling asleep in front of my computer, reading updates, etc. The exhaustion was also coming from the emotional stress that I had while my Mom was here. I and my sister drove her to the airport last weekend. She was supposed to leave in the middle of the week, but the airlines cancelled her connecting flight. After some negotiations with the airlines (which low budget, small airline with not much credibility), some heated arguments (my Mom could not decide what was the best choice for her ticket change and wanted us to decide for her), then some tears on my Mom’s part (which made my sister and I feel guilty again), we secured the tickets. She had to stay for another 3 days. So, all that made a toll on my emotional state and also made me very tired.

The life still goes on though. I went to a concert last Sunday with a group of friends (all ladies.) On Friday I went for dinner with a bunch of other friends to celebrate one of the B-days. I’m invited to another B-day party this week too.

It’s been quite on H’s part. I learnt that he’s been at the vacation home for the last week, and going to be there even longer. Not sure if he has no work, or just taking time off.

Here is where I have some concerns. My son stopped by yesterday to pick up his mail. I asked him if he expected some important mail or needed anything from me. He said that he just wanted to stop by and that he was around the neighborhood. I thought that it was kind of interesting, because normally he would have some other purpose to stop by, not just to see me. So we talked and he told me that he, his GF and maybe their friend are going to the vacation home this weekend. He said that H invited them. There is going to be an off-road event again. I said that it is great and they will enjoy their time there.

Well, here is what bothering me here. I’m absolutely happy that my son and H are going to spend some time together. But, I had a feeling that my son came to see me so he could tell me about the trip. Was he looking for my approval? Or, looking at my reaction? This makes me think that I’m not very clear at communicating to my son that I’m OK with him having a relationship with H. I don’t know, is this what it’s about?

I also feel that my son really wants this relationship, but maybe feels guilty about it. After all, I asked him just last week if they (him and his GF) had any plans to go to the vacation home, and he told me that they didn’t. He is working full time and taking 3 classes at school, which are high level classes and not the easy once. He is already missing some hours from work, which means he is making less money. So, for him to take Friday off to go to the vacation home is a big decision. He must really want it.

I’m not even thinking about H’s motives here. He is reaching out to my son, that’s for sure. Is he bored, or is it a genuine desire to connect? I just don’t want my son to be hurt. He is an adult, but I would still feel terrible if he is hurt.

So far, I only expressed my support for any interruption between my son and H. But, I’m thinking that it might not be enough. Maybe I need to talk to my son to clear the air and let him know that I will always be happy for him having a relationship with his step Dad. I don’t know if I’m being too sensitive here.

On another note, discovered that the woman H brought to my city for the weekend run back in July and the one he was making the long trips to, is no longer friends with him on FB. I wonder what happened there. Just curios. I was pretty much settled with the thought that she might be an actual ow. It doesn’t bother me one way or another. I think I’m just too tired, physically and emotionally. I don’t care.