determined to overcome this storm part 2

[Vanilla]

OK, so that interaction is neither romantic nor bonding.

It released some anger, and won't even work as a truth dart.

However, WH did breach a boundary, that made you angry and screaming banshee mode emerged. Been there, worn that T shirt, and won't make you feel good. It's wrong on all levels, checks many boxes. You may feel shame and disgust, and beat yourself up. Let's learn from it and move on, it is as it is.

That reaction is called flooding of emotions. I will post you the link so you can observe it on another's sitch. It is important I think that you apologise, not for the content but for the delivery. So " I apologise or being angry with you. " No excuses or rationalisations. "This doesn't help us co-parent our children and makes this difficult for both of us." Validating statement. I will make a great effort to change this." Solution without promise.

If you wish to enforce your boundary then you will have to do so calmly and have a consequence so in a couple of days a second text with the boundary and a request.

Let's define the boundary: "whilst you are in my home or with us as a family then it is important that you keep your phone blocked to receive and send calls with OW. I think this will help keep our co parenting interactions positive"

Next can we examine how you can help yourself hold "screaming banshee" in check?

What do you think will help you?

There is a major technique used in business for anger and I will research it for you.

I understand you are disappointed and WH has sacked you as his W and his soulmate. Let him go burn out his PA. clearly he is in the addicted phase.

I may need a second post as at the moment my iPad looses my posts when I try to link.

V