Solo, give your marriage the gift of time and enjoy your children. Acknowledge your pain, feel your pain and then put it down. Do not to not dwell on it.
What we can do in the meantime is improve ourselves, be the best dads we can and give our wifes the time and space to work through their issues. This is the simple yet effective solution to our situation.
Be present for you wife and kids. Be strong for your wife and kids. Have faith for your wife and kids. Never give up.