Parents: help me parenting while separated (2)

[Ripe]

T-3
Right now I just feel disgusted at my STBXW.
The kids are still a bit tired from yesterday's journey.
S9 wanted to skip some classes in the afternoon.
STBXW was just now telling him that was not possible, bla, bla, bla, and used a final argument: "Ripes never give up, right Daddy?"
What is happening to me?
I feel so well when I am away, not missing STBXW at all. I think it is because she has not been my companion for so long that I only remember a vague friendship and bond.
And then, when we are under the same roof I only feel sadness and anger, resentment and hate. I even regret having met this woman at all.
Like yesterday night, when S9 was writing his name on some school assignment while sitting at the dinner table, where he has worked for the last four years. STBXW said: "At least he will have a desk in his new house."
I could barely hold my tong as I wanted to say: "He will have a desk there but not a dad."
I hope this hate fades away once the move out is done.