Raliced, when I have a parenting issue, I try to think of what I would have done if we had still been happily M (well, perhaps I was the only one happy, but you know what I mean). And I think you did that, you brought it up to him, and he heard you. He might have been defensive at the time, tried to brush it off, but there's no way he didn't understand your point. And I doubt he'll do it again. I probably wouldn't get the phone unless it happens again, give him a chance to fix it himself before you send your D7 the message that daddy isn't trustworthy.
But I do feel your frustration at having to clean up his mess.
Mozza, I read it as D4 being home with dad at the playdate.
