Alligator Love

[Zues126]

Thanks Painter. I agree with you about the 50/50. It is taking time, however I will say that STBX has been accommodating in the sense of letting me have them 5/14 nights voluntarily and flexing a bit during the summer. She wants me in their lives and has been an advocate, not an obstacle. She may not want the school year schedule disrupted and we differ a bit on this, but she hasn't been horrible by any stretch. Hopefully we can work through this L to L.

As for the parenting class, she and her L were asking that I attend one. My L said "no problem, let's agree that you BOTH attend one". She said it was a good thing to do, but that we wanted to keep on an even footing and not allow the perception that she was the 'good parent' and I was the 'incompetent one'. So this is probably going to occur already.

For me I feel diffusing the situation has been my best move. I don't think it's that big of a deal. I feel making it a big deal will make it a big deal. If I'm just like "meh, we're different people, of course we'll feel differently sometimes" then it kind of makes it less of a deal. At least that's the example I'm setting. Whereas for me to take issue with it and confront STBX directly or through L's, I feel this is making it bigger than it needs to be. Particularly when STBX appears to be trying to be respectful and just leaks a little criticism here and there. I have thought of what's best for the children in deciding this approach.

I do appreciate your feedback though. It's nice to have alternatives should I feel the situation degenerate to where it can't be swept under the rug.