Warm wishes and hugs to you, so sorry you had to go through that experience. It is shocking and surreal. What a ~!@#$%^&*()_+ for doing that to you on your birthday.
It is more of a shock when things seemed like they had been steadily improving between you two. Remember also that WAS often will revert back to their stated position whenever they feel like they are put at risk, at least they will openly state that. Who knows what they are actually thinking. The others might be right, you might want to state how you feel. This might be a test, it might not, but what do you have to lose by stating how you truly feel and asking for what you want? This is the opportunity to have an R talk.
It seems odd and even scary to have an R talk when it has been avoided for so long, but they do need to happen. The air needs to be cleared every now and then and sometimes you might discover it increases the comfort level to have more R talks and the WAS is no longer as shy of having them.
You can do this and get through this. Many successful DRers have gone through this stage and turned it around. Maybe it really does provide pressure relief to them and they can focus on other feelings. It is up to you to decide how you will conduct yourself during this difficult time. We are all behind you no matter what you decide is right for you.
