Really good advice, Painter. Part of my reason for fighting so hard to stay M, is because of the collateral damage to the kids...and mine are adults and hurting like crazy! I cannot imagine hand-offs...must be a unique torture for all concerned.
I lived with this for well over a decade. I'll never forget when my stepchildren came back from their mother's and told us how they excitedly had told her on arrival that we had been on such a fun trip, and her response was an agitated: "He took you out of state??!!" and went on to totally crush their joy and make them feel like they had been in actual danger on a road trip with their father and his family.
It's incredibly damaging to the kids. It may seem like small stuff to us, but it isn't to them.
M 16 yrs, WH62, P54 3 adult blended kids EA 11/13, BD1 6/14 PA fall 14, BD2 2/15 Piecing 2015, BD3 12/15 Separated 4/16 WH moved OW in 5/16 Divorced 6/15/17
