The aftermath:I heard through the kids that STBX didn't approve. She didn't think D4 should've been dropped off with shorts too big (D4 told me they stayed up just fine though). She didn't think the book I was reading them was age appropriate (they love it though). And so on. And she continues to give me 30 second mini-lectures when I pick up the kids about how to parent them, although she's clearly making an effort to only say what she feels is critical and let me 'learn from my own mistakes' as she says sometimes.
I have a huge problem with this. It's totally inappropriate behavior by your Ex to tell the children she disapproves of your decisions, and I think you should send an e-mail and suggest a co-parenting class so she can learn appropriate ways to deal with her feelings about what you do or don't do. She is putting the kids in the middle and making them feel like they have to defend one parent from the other. It's extremely (and typically) damaging to them and I would nip it in the bud.
If she continues to do this, it could be defined as parental alienation, which is beginning to be sufficient to lose custody over. All divorced parents should be familiar with the term and its implications.
Also, may I ask why you are not going for 50/50 custody? The kids have been used to living with you all the time, right?
I'd also stop by the school with a big smile to make sure they have your info so they can contact you if they have any questions, and that they will send you all paperwork that goes out.
Ex is not the gatekeeper to your children or their schools. They are your children just as much as hers.
She does not get to decide what the standard for good parenting is. If she disagrees with what you do, she needs to learn to bite her tongue, unless she thinks you are putting them in direct danger.
*Getting off my soap box*
M 16 yrs, WH62, P54 3 adult blended kids EA 11/13, BD1 6/14 PA fall 14, BD2 2/15 Piecing 2015, BD3 12/15 Separated 4/16 WH moved OW in 5/16 Divorced 6/15/17
