Tad, You have a good heart and the kindness you should the kitty was heartwarming. I'm only sorry that the little guy was killed the next day. Have you given any thought to possibly getting a kitten? They can be indoors and probably are no more work than what you experienced with your ratties? A kitten would be a great companion for you and they have just as much unconditional love as a rattie.
I think a cruise would do you a world of good and it would give you something to look forward to. The Alaskan cruises are great and the scenery is beautiful. You would certainly enjoy yourself.
Tad, you are going to be okay. It just takes time to dig out of the deep, dark hole. Take it one day at a time.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
