She mentioned leaving the equity in the house to use for the kids education. But this leaves us both tied to this house I think. I don't know if her intention is to try to keep her name on the house too. It sounds so messy to me.
This is actually not a bad idea, and it's done fairly frequently. You jointly own the house with her for the next three years with a clear understanding of how household repairs get paid (e.g. if it needs a new roof, you pay for that). Then, when D15 graduates from high school (and maybe goes away to college), you downsize to a smaller place and use the equity to pay for college. It's not a bad solution.
Originally Posted By: u-turn
She says that she doesn't want to waste money on a L when there is no fight between us.
Could you tell her it's required to have someone look over the paperwork on her behalf? It doesn't have to be expensive. It's certainly going to be cheaper than re-visiting in five years.
Originally Posted By: u-turn
I do need to get with my L early this week and tell him all of this.
Yes, that's critical. Let us know what he says.
As far as keeping a scorecard and being resentful, well...let it go, U. There's no place for anger, resentment, or bitterness in your wonderful future. There's something better out there than what you are mentally holding on to. Don't be so busy looking backwards that you miss what's just up the road. Don't look back, U, you aren't going that way.
Underdog tells me that "resentment happens when we're expecting others to take care of our needs when we're not willing to step up to the plate to take care of them ourselves." If you want some fun weekend reading, go back to my thread and see how many times she's explained that to me. Spoiler: it's a lot. But she's right every time, so think about what that means in your life.
Overall, I think you are doing great, U. Hang in there.
