Judy, hang in there, I try to think of a setback as a learning opportunity. I just had a huge blowout fight with my sweetie pie and I learned that
1- I am still taking the bait, and need to work on that, I am setting up a challenge for myself- I seem to be able to go for a good 3 weeks before slipping up, this time I am going to last 5 weeks. (or longer.)
2- I am also capable of being ok the day after a fight and detached enough that the "fight" or slip up doesn't set me back and doesn't control my emotions for the next day or week like it used to.
Wherever you are in your journey with this, there is something to be learned about yourself with every setback, so use it to improve your emotional state and DB strategy. Its an opportunity to evaluate yourself. Don't use it to evaluate H though, although it is good that he apologized, but he's too unpredictable and you need to focus on yourself. So what can you learn from this fight? You can work on your validation skills and on STFU. You also learned that you can make a DB mistake, and be fine the next day because there is more going on in your life than DB or your H. Good detachment. You are getting stronger each day.
