RD, thanks for the visit! Well, I did receive a nice reply from H in the end. It's funny how he starts with a formal update - no warmth at all. Then I respond helpfully and then his reply is back to using 'his' name for me and saying how kind that is and how much he appreciates it and with a little joke thrown in too. It's like he expects us to be cold & formal, but then my response disarms him and he comes back in a much more friendly way. No mention of D update.
I replied to my L yesterday. Most � queries I have been pretty flexible on and am letting pass. But there's one big area we are querying. H has 'interests' in a number of businesses. He called then 'shell' companies and said there isn't anything there. My L is concerned that no accounts have been submitted for these as required, so we have asked for them. I imagine he won't be thrilled about that, but there we are. I didn't feel I could let that one pass as he hasn't supplied the required info.
For me, I have been thinking some more about how long it has been now. H checked out of our M in Dec '13 and decided to start 'dating.' Almost two years ago now, though BD wasn't until six months later. I guess I'm starting to think I may be approaching the time where I truly do move on. In part I feel I don't even want to have the dificult job of rebuilding after infidelity if that even became an option. I wonder if it is worth it. I know people do, but am I that person? I would quite like to go for a drink with this attractive guy from work who seems interested in me. I would like to have enough money to cover my living costs now.
Equally, I love H and think I would still want to try if he showed any interest in doing so. I guess I'm a little divided just now. I can truly see that, given the times things take, many LBS's get to a point where they have moved on. It is such a shame, and I know I needn't do that, but I'm just not sure quite what I want anymore and whether I want to R with H at all. Perhaps we all go through this?
Other than that, looking forward to a nice day with my family - cooking lunch for them as my sister is down to celebrate my Dad's birthday. It's a lovely sunny morning here. Have a good day all xx
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
