Got here late... but I'm here now.

[duke]

V - you are an awesome display of human sensitivity and support. I am almost in tears. Thank you a million times.

I'm in a quandary over several things and I need some advice from the board (again). I gave my wife my word that I would not change anything with our accounts, credit cards etc until she got back and I would tell her. This was for almost 4 months and with 1 full month in Europe. Several lawyers told me I was nuts if I didn't separate all the finances from day one. My wife is a teacher so wouldn't make and money over the entire summer and I didn't want my family (especially kids) to suffer in any way because of what W was doing. I didn't want her to suffer either even though she was the one doing all this. Pretty stupid of me I guess?

Well today was her first pay day and guess what? She changed her pay deposit from our joint account and deposited her first cheque into her own account. Without telling me anything. I went against the advice of several lawyers and left myself totally exposed financially so that she and my kids would be comfortably supported all summer and the first chance she gets, her first pay cheque she dumps into her own account and doesn't even have the decency to let me know.

I set up my own account finally today and deposited some cheques into it. I also transferred some money from our joint account into my account. - This may be a problem because she will see it and may panic. She will see this and may empty our account.

Should I tell her I set up this new account and transferred the money? I gave her my word and have never once lied to her.

Should I confront her about depositing her cheque first chance she had in spite all the chances I took all summer by leaving our accounts open?

Should I split up all our investments and accounts now and tell her when done?

I am at a loss here as to what I should do. Normally I am totally decisive.

Any advice?