Wow, mind is blown 7

[asitis]

Pleasant is just how things are between healthy co-parent relations. Don't read too much into it. It is what it is, but doesn't have any significance in itself. My W & I can have very pleasant conversations, including when she brings up setting our next negotiation toward D meeting. So, read nothing into it.

That said, see how far you two have come since your first posts? Remember when handoffs were so much more difficult? I'm not saying that you will end up in marital bliss, but that's a lot of progress. It is good, no matter the legal status of things. It is good for your S. It is good for the next decade & a half when you could very likely be having to please S & get along w/ each other. Could it lead to salvaging a romantic, committed R? Who knows? If it's making things better, that's good.

It's not about getting her to give you what you want. Really, it isn't. It is about learning to get along with each other. If she then takes care of her issues while you are rebuilding that foundation, then good times. But notice that you have control only over the rebuilding that foundation. She is going to need to take care of her end, and there is no guarantee that she will. Baby steps. See how far you have come. That is good DBing, even if it doesn't result in a M or renewed M.