Jim0987 #15 - Further on up the road

[jim0987]

Dawn, thank you for the prayer, its nice to receive and its good to read about the happiness you're finding.

Sotto, as usual you're right it's not nice to receive but she had warned me and there were no unpleasant surprises. She is asking me to pay half the fees and I've discussed with my L whether it woukd be reasonable to say no, she should pay them all.

RD, actually I'm getting better picturing myself happy. I've just got to keep working on me and squash some of the negative inner monologue. The kids are so important to me and my gratitude that they are who they are and my wish to be the best I can for them has been the biggest single factor in any maturity I've shown in all this.

Mozza, thanks - I also keep up on your thread just haven't had much I can add. I'm definitely appreciating the freedom to just be, leave the washing up or go out without having to check its ok, so I can see the positives.

It's strange I can still see all the positives in my XW, but can increasingly see the negatives as well, so I have a more rounded impression. I do sometimes wonder if my issue is not so much we separated but that she ended it and moved on so easily. Then I tell myself it doesn't matter I just need to learn what I can and live a better life in the future.

As a related aside, today I provided my lawyer with a response to the grounds cited. I tried to avoid making a scorecard but it was a little 'yes but...'

It was quite carthatic and made me realise how little my XW appreciated my circumstances or has reflected on her own conduct. Even if it goes nowhere I felt better for it.

Anyway thank you all for posting