Thanks for popping into my thread, and thanks Azzork for putting us together. I can't believe how much in common we've got in our feelings about what is going on right now.
In terms of responses - I think both of our situations are tricky because they don't exactly fit the model. We're not really LBS and we constantly wonder whether the BD is something we should do.
BUT I have to say I have found the idea of setting goals and working on myself and detaching from DH very useful. I am a total beginner so this isn't advice, but just something to share. I've been asking myself a question recently. Which is: what is it about me, my history and my self esteem that makes me settle for so little from an intimate partner? What is it about me that makes me give so little, or give only with a guarantee of return? I don't have the answers yet, and maybe these aren't the right questions for you to be asking. But I know finding these questions and devoting some thought to them has made me feel much calmer and more in control of myself, and much happier about the FACT that I am not in control of my DH.
Anyway - hope this is useful. Let me know what you think.
