Yeah it's par for the course I'm afraid. She will accuse you of being pressuring and controlling any time you question her or, frankly, any time she feels like it. Go as dark as possible because you will be the enemy for as long as the OM is in the picture.
Me:29 W:27 M: 4 years T: 5 years No children S: 7/7/15 EA: 7/7/15 BD/"I'm done": 7/15/15 MC: 7/7/15-8/21/15 (failed) PA: 8/29/15 W Files for D: 9/9/15 D will finalize in 60 days