Lost, please cut yourself some slack. I think you are being to hard on yourself.
Your try to keep your marriage alive and then experience a parental nightmare, losing your kid. You are stressed and will be for a while. I think crying is a healthy way to reduce stress. I cried more in 2015 then I did since I was a child.
I think your doing great with everything your up against. Take it day by day and breathe in the breath of a peaceful mind.
