Yeah - I feel like I have a choice, sometimes, between obeying his every whim, being a good little girl, and getting a pat on the head, or by being an adult, and being presented with the silent treatment.
Now of course - lots of the things he asks for are totally reasonable, and I need to do better in remembering them.
But some of them are just preferences - how he likes the tea-towels hung - and to me it seems to feed into a really bad dynamic to obey these kind of preferences as if they were 'rules' just so I can get some measly drops of attention from him.
I don't doubt he feels if only I properly loved him I'd never ever forget to put the chain on the front door ever again. But I don't think he knows that when he treats me like I child, I can't feel comfy in acting like a wife to him.
