1. When I saw her number on my phone (I deleted her contact info to keep me from texting her randomly awhile ago), I did not get that quick heart beat. I stayed status quo mentally. I think most people on here might understand how big that is. 2. I read the text, quickly processed the info, then promptly deleted the text. I decided there was no need for a response here. I did not want to throw away almost 3 weeks of no contact just to say 'thanks'.
I feel good about how I felt during this. It is such a little, stupid thing I know, but this is exactly the type of thing that has set me back in the past.
You are doing great!
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I guess I was expecting a little more respect compared to just an ex-boyfriend?? Actually I am not really sure. In my head, we are married, there should be an effort to save things. That is a very good question now that you raise it though, why would it be any different, I guess it would not.
Unfortunately, it's not about what's in your head, but what's in hers.
A WW has no respect for her LBH. In fact, I'd say ex-boyfriends probably have more. I'm sure that is difficult for you to grasp about your own W.
I believe your best bet is to go completely dark. That means she hears nothing, reads nothing, and sees nothing from you. If she reaches the place of wanting to go back to you.....that is when you have the opportunity to give her the conditions (MC, no contact with other men, transparency, accountability, etc.) If she is not willing to cooperate, then she's not ready to return to the M.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
