Good luck on the new job prospect. Work is like another relationship all on its own, so I know how it is when both fronts are now well. I always compare job hunting to dating. Putting your best self forward until you find a good match!!
Last edited by BT13; 09/09/1501:47 AM.
Me: 42 H: 40 M: 12 H moved out - 8/2015 I filed - 8/2015
Congrats on the second interview Dif! You're a rock star. Sometimes we all just need to get a little bit of good news. Heck reading that just made my day a bit brighter.
And don't worry about being a sad sack, this place is called Divorce Busting. DIVORCE Busting. It's not a comedy conference even though some of the most positive people I know seem to be congregating here.
If you can make it through here, and through our sitchs, the rest of our lives should be relatively easy. I'd stare a natural disaster in the face right now. Earthquake? Ha! Here are my plans Mr Earthquake. I'm going to GAL, 180, and keep a PMA while you rip the ground up. I'll have Wonka help me afterwards with a well written "Dear Mr. Earthquake" email. Please, I can handle anything now.
Keep that PMA up, you're thriving under the most difficult of circumstances. Not everyday is going to be sunshine and roses, but we'll get through them all.
Big hug Dif,
PP
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
Me: 46 Her: 41 M: 5.5 yrs / S: 20, 18 3/26 W and I meet OW BD: 5/2/2015, she takes off ring W goes to stay with OW 6/26 NC: 9/5 Both moved out: 10/16 I take off my ring and feel... healed: 10/19
Gosh, this is so true, Heavy. I have been in the rabbit hole too often. I think in my case, it's just that I've lost so much, and finding hope has been challenging. I've needed this. No guarantees anything is going to work out, but it's something.
Again, wish you were close enough to buy you a drink. I find that sort of thing with my friends helps beyond measure.
Hugs, Heavy.
Dif
Me: 46 Her: 41 M: 5.5 yrs / S: 20, 18 3/26 W and I meet OW BD: 5/2/2015, she takes off ring W goes to stay with OW 6/26 NC: 9/5 Both moved out: 10/16 I take off my ring and feel... healed: 10/19
Thanks, Photoka. I probably am more of a sad sack here than anywhere else (except my DivorceCare group), because in my "real world," I'm good at hiding things. So grateful for everyone here.
Me: 46 Her: 41 M: 5.5 yrs / S: 20, 18 3/26 W and I meet OW BD: 5/2/2015, she takes off ring W goes to stay with OW 6/26 NC: 9/5 Both moved out: 10/16 I take off my ring and feel... healed: 10/19
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
Thank you, Bob. And praying for you still, and always!
Me: 46 Her: 41 M: 5.5 yrs / S: 20, 18 3/26 W and I meet OW BD: 5/2/2015, she takes off ring W goes to stay with OW 6/26 NC: 9/5 Both moved out: 10/16 I take off my ring and feel... healed: 10/19
Pig Pen, I liked your reference to the earthquake. I was thinking the other day how much I'd enjoy being in the Walking Dead scenario, because smashing zombies in the brains would be really satisfying compared to my current life. Bring it on.
Maybe we are all being prepared for something crazy in the future and us DB'ers will be the only survivors because we've got the skills to make it.
Hey PigPen! I'm NO rockstar. But I'm encouraged by the prospect. It's a startup dealing with death and dying, and like you say with regard to Mr Earthquake here, it's like... bring it on! Nothing can shake me now. As long as Wonka helps us write the emails, right???
Not focusing on it, but also today... she's moving, we have a few texts/emails to ensure that I'm not here when she is. She thinks our son is racking up data on a phone plan he abandoned months ago... I am short, quick, and to the point with my responses. But I do write in one email that I will steer clear of the house all day tomorrow if she needs me to so she can move as much stuff out of the place as possible before her "beach vacation" next week. Unexpectedly, she writes back thanking me for being so considerate, and noting how I've always been that way.
Does it mean anything? It might. But it's not my circus today.
Off to sleep... thanks again, PP. Yes, I'll get through the tough days. So will you... you are a serious inspiration to me!
Dif
Me: 46 Her: 41 M: 5.5 yrs / S: 20, 18 3/26 W and I meet OW BD: 5/2/2015, she takes off ring W goes to stay with OW 6/26 NC: 9/5 Both moved out: 10/16 I take off my ring and feel... healed: 10/19
WW was playing games this week, trying to show up at the house at times when she thought I might be there, including this morning. I know it's killing her that I went away last weekend and she doesn't know with whom or any details. I think she just wants to have the chance to "casually" ask me. Thankfully I think she's already on the road out of town, so I get a week's break from all this...
The good news is, the startup is making me an offer and sending me a scope of work this weekend - the offer includes an equity stake, and for the first time in a very long time, I am actually excited about the work I'm about to do. It's helping me to keep the focus on me and moving forward, not on my WW. But as far as it might have any impact there? As my friend put it when I told her all that, "That's the woman she needs to want to come back to. The Dif that is the person who is doing what God has placed her on Earth to do."
So I own this much: I lost my own sense of purpose in order to be 100% supportive of her goals and plans - plans that were conceived to keep her from being stuck overseas, plans intended to build a life for us together. But, at the same time, I lost my own spark and passion for my own things. That IS the kind of woman she was drawn to in the beginning. No excuse for what she's done. But yeah... I'm so grateful for this opportunity to do what I do well, and to do it with passion for the work.
Hope you all have a great weekend.
Me: 46 Her: 41 M: 5.5 yrs / S: 20, 18 3/26 W and I meet OW BD: 5/2/2015, she takes off ring W goes to stay with OW 6/26 NC: 9/5 Both moved out: 10/16 I take off my ring and feel... healed: 10/19
