Hey U, I am here, with all the good vibes I can muster from across the planet. I agree with V, this went as well as could be expected. D15 sounds like she is waiting to see and containing herself until she knows that the next bit will look and feel like. Your S18, has done a lovely job of communciating himself, I agree with As though that he also needs, time to be 18 and respond as a kid whose parents are separating. But of course you know him best and how he manages change and stress. You haven't really spoken of your old boy S21. How are things there?
Sounds like you are revisiting emotions from BD time, that was to be expected, as I said new trasition and change in the relationship, we revisit feeling and emotions. Hang in there U! I beleive that Wife too is likly to be swinging between emotions and revisiting her commitment to you and the family. It is ever so tempting with someone we love, to want and soothe and comfort and take their pain away. Please hold your boundaries for yourself around this with wife. Right now you are inching forward, getting out of the stuckness. Potentially offering her too much comfort, will stop the momentum.
I am sorry that I have few words of real meaningful advice.
