Sounds like she has completely lost it. She probably had a crazy fantasy about this other man would give her a better life than with you. She quickly realized that this was a fantasy and that she was losing you then she panicked. I would insist she sees counselling at the very least if not a psychological evaluation before you even talk to her about getting back together, if that is even what you want. I would also insist in seeing your kids before you talk with her about getting back together as well. Sounds like you have some control back here but don't abuse it. Be fair and respectful and strong. Good luck brother.
matt/duke - I would be careful doing any of the stuff I highlighted in blue. That all sounds very controlling to me.
In my opinion, it is easy to say all of the things she said. I would wait for her to take action to suggest that she is serious about reconciling.
