Your W is not truly remorseful about the A. She's just scared that you will leave her. You need to lay down serious boundaries and make her follow them. Top priority would be immediately ending all contact with OM. And you need total transparency from her to make sure that she follows through. That means open access to phone, computer, all social media accounts, etc. If she's not willing to agree then she's not serious about working on your M. She's simply biding her time.
Take it from someone who put up with a WW for years. They are expert liars and manipulators. If you don't get this under control now, she will continue this A and possibly many others until she eventually leaves you. Don't stand for it. Now is the time to make her choose. Stay strong.
Me 47 W 42 T 24 yrs M 18 yrs W living with OM BD1: 3/7/2015 (A with OM#1) BD2: 4/11/2015 (A with OM#2, W moves out) WW filed for D, papers received 9/18/2015. Meeting to determine child custody 9/29/2015.
