Walkaway Wife - Ended in D

[rdken]

I'm new to the forum but have been lurking for a few weeks. Let me share my story.

In early July, my W of 4 years moved out to live with her parents after I discovered her EA. I tried the begging and pleading stage but that was all very brief, less than a week. I found the DB and DR books soon after and read them. Began doing 180s and so forth. The W agreed to marriage counseling (big mistake by the way, if you have no proof A is over). We went through 4-5 marriage counseling sessions which were not doing any good, and I could tell this by her actions. She was already finished, done, over with M. Finally, in mid August, I had proof that EA had turned to PA. As Sandi suggests, I took a tough love stance but put it in writing stating that I was "releasing her to her choices, but that she must make a choice, as I would not live in an open marriage". I was fully prepared for any action she might take. She showed no remorse, saying that she was sorry she didn't tell me sooner. She filed for D and the D is now final. My question is, and Sandi may want to weigh in on this, how often do you see these situations turn around? Do WW that initiate D ever return? I do want to have a MR with her and I wanted to have a family. But I do understand that I cannot tolerate living like that. I have more self respect than that. I have left the door open for R for a short time, but it will close at some point. She would have to show genuine remorse and repentance. At this point, I plan on going and staying dark with no contact.

I would appreciate any thoughts, especially from Sandi, or from other husbands of WW.

Thank you all,
rdken