Remember she had a head start on you in the moving on department. I'd also say that it isn't clear that she has moved on. She may be dating (I can't remember if you know or not), but that's not the same as moving on.
When someone asks you why you haven't moved on, just shrug and say "I'm a slow learner." Leave it, and don't worry what they think. You'll know when it is time.
On the unfairness of bringing people together while your R falls apart, this is just life. They look all lovey and happy from the outside, but you have no idea the health of their Rs. Just let it go. Be happy for them, just as they will for you when you find happiness in another, be it the old flame or a new one.
All that said, I often look around at couples where the guy is clearly not a very good H, and wonder why my M is dissolving when I was better even at my worst. Got tiring after a while, otherwise, I'm sure I'd still be doing it.
Thanks As, that's good advice. I like the "I'm a slow learner" line. I understand where people are coming from, they want to see me happy again, but it's not their business. As I said in a prior post, even if I weren't DB'ing I wouldn't be within a country mile of being emotionally ready to be with someone else. I'm still very much in love with my WAW.
As for people acting poorly and staying married...I just got off the phone with my parents. Standard call - within 2 minutes they are bickering over complete minutia. My father said that they left for dinner at 7, my mom said they left at 7:15. It was completely inconsequential to the quality of the food, but it was worth arguing over until I asked them to stop. They're going on 45 years together!
My W and I didn't make it to year 4.
One day at a time with all of this. One day at a time.
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
