Wow, mind is blown 7

[Uphill]

New thread, I'll be back on later with a few thoughts...

[Uphill]

So, last night my phone did ring. At 1:30 AM. It was XF. My greatest fear came to life, my son was in need of the emergency room. Having trouble breathing and uncontrollably coughing. We have been down this road before, as a family. But this time I was 2 states away, in a hotel room. S4 has athesma and a simple cold progresses into more very quickly.

I obviously answered the phone. XF was in a panic. She didn't know what to do or where to go. After realizing what was going on (I was in a dead sleep when the phone rang) I calmly said to her, if it is bad enough that you are calling me at this time, get him in the car and go! She kept me posted throughout the night and everything happened just as it had before. Same medicines, same procedures. Pretty standard stuff but it is very scary to see. Even more scary to not be there!

Anyways, all is well with S4 now. He was out of the hospital by 9AM. I'm now home and got to see my little buddy.

This situation is why when my phone rings, I have a hard time not answering...

[asitis]

I'm glad your S4 was OK. You should answer your phone in situations like that, just make clear that calls are for emergencies. Texts for non-emergencies.

She not only let you know, but turned to you for help, and you were there. Not that you want to have to go through this often, but that was a very positive thing for your R. Now, praise her for how she handled it, and thank her for being such a responsible and dependable mom to your S. Expose your own vulnerability even if it risks a hurt by expressing how scared all that makes you even though you know it is going to be handled, & maybe add how powerless you felt, but that it was better because you knew he was in good hands with her.

Let her talk about anything she wants, and by all means don't tell her what she could have done better. She turned to you because she relies on you to help at times. She likely would have made a good decision on her own, but her instinct was that you are better as a team. So, keep that winning team spirit up with that nurturing respect for how she took care of things.

[Uphill]

I took your advise and sent her a text thanking her for thinking to call me and handling the situation like she did. It honestly not only made me panic, but made me feel good by getting that call.

[asitis]

Good.

Next time you talk face-to-face. Develop that conversation further. It really needs some eye contact so that she can see the respect & regard behind the words.

[Uphill]

I will see her very early tomorrow morning. I'm talking like 4AM. I won't bring it up then, but next time which will prolly be Wednesday I will reinforce the fact that I appriciate everything she did and how she handled it!

[asitis]

Unless you're both really - and I mean really - morning people,that sounds prudent. I can't tell you how many times I've got this great connection idea, and plow ahead when it isn't really the right time.

[Uphill]

Yeah, definatly gonna just play cool in the morning and bring it up later. As much as I would like to get it "out of the way" I would rather wait for a better time that I can actually talk if it goes that route.

[Uphill]

Keeping in mind that I have tomorrow off and don't sleep in often, a holiday day is a rare occasion and I want to enjoy it instead of getting into anything good or bad that could get my mind going that early...

[PigPen]

Glad everything is good with S4. I have asthma too and have crawled out of a house and to my car before. One of the scariest night's of my life!

Great job handling it, and for affirming with your XF on how she handled. it.

But, sorry it took your S4 needing help to get you there. Truly.

PP