Halo, thanks for the advice and the encouragement. A new perspective is always helpful and welcome, and it so helps me to have others see the progress too. Sometimes we are just too close to our own sitches, getting all tripped up on the details.
As much as she seems to be enjoying them, and as much as I enjoy giving them, I do think I need to lighten up on the massages, and hope it draws her to ask for them, or maybe if I'm really lucky I'll get one.
Quote: Maybe give some thought to new, exciting things you can do on your own that would interest W- something to make you seem enticing.
Rj2, I think you're right. W was really into tennis while she was in school. I've got a tennis racket, but I've never really played, so I've been thinking I may sign up for a couple lessons. (Hmm, now if I can just find some time between work, taking care of the house, and posting here on the board...)
Rottzilla, I am in complete agreement w/ you about how the resentment sneaks up when we feel we're doing too much for them. When W started to get cranky about the massage the other morning, I was hurt--and just a little angry too--but I let it go and went off to play with the cat instead. I need to remember that the rollercoaster goes up, and the rollercoaster goes down, and the important thing is that I didn't get upset about it.
Quote: do you think it's slightly possible that she could be using OM at this point as a way to get you to keep doing these things for her? Even subconsciously?
Hmmm. Now you've got me wondering. Could be, could be...
BTW, W doesn't drink very much (and even when she does it takes her over an hour to finish one beer). I tried to offer her a glass of wine w/ dinner a few weeks ago, but she turned it down, so I'm uncertain about the opportunity there. I will keep it in mind though.
One last update, W has been offered an interview w/ another company. She needs her resume updated and asked me to help. I told her absolutely, I'd be delighted. Another 180... W had been quite upset with me a few years ago when her resume had needed updating and I had told her I didn't have the time, so I think this could be good.
