Quote: This one's a little tough as W and I were pretty much an item w/in a week of meeting, I mean we connected right away and knew it. But I could probably outline some behavior that characterized our early stages together... --an almost complete disregard for time (the only time that mattered was the time we spent together). --playfullness and an unconscious expectation that fun would happen when we were together. --QT: we would sit around in each other's arms and talk for hours aobut anything. --AOS: She would make me dinner, and I would bring her a bottle of wine. --I don't think either of us ever did much of getting all prettied up for the other during those early days, we would just hang out at her apartment in our pajamas.
I have been trying to think about "us" in the beginning of our R and THIS is it. This is EXACTLY what we were like. Thanks again Renew. Whenever I am in a fog and can't think back to those times (am I blocking?), you put it so succinctly that it just hits me. I remember just talking and talking and talking and time standing still for us.
Quote: As a result, much of my doing-what-works-behavior has been to make myself completely available for her, unconditionally. I'm certain it's been a major factor in the improvements between us, and so I'm awfully nervous about changing that behavior. I do want to draw her in, though. I desperately want her to initiate some kind of physical touch between us. But I don't want to do anything--either by error or omission--that would lead her to believe I was returning to my old ways. I also don't want to appear--like OM has started to--that I am nervous about losing her. I'm a little on eggshells about all of this, and I could really use more advice.
I also feel as if I am doing too much for H, and I caught myself almost feeling resentful last night as he asked me to stop on my way home to pick up his shampoo. We live 5 minutes from the store, and I was tired from working and going to school all day... but I think you are right for continuing doing things for her. It seems to be working.
Thought... As I have read in other threads, do you think it's slightly possible that she could be using OM at this point as a way to get you to keep doing these things for her? Even subconsciously?
Do you guys drink? H and I don't (or didn't) regularly. But lately, it seems our biggest baby steps have come after he's had a few.
