Happy Anniversary, its so nice to hear that it was different from last year.
I dont have any advice because I don't feel I am in a position to give any, you are further along the path than me.
My story is a bit different from yours but a lot of the things you wrote did feel similar. My h mother smothered him and so he tends to not get close to anyone. His career choices meant him being away from home a lot and while that suited him, when he was at home I became jealous of his time and resentful when he gave it to other things. I see now that I should have been stronger and more forceful in telling him how unhappy I was and leaving me to raise our (challenging) children made me feel abandoned. I became needy and desperate for attention and that made everything worse. In saying that, I am not sure it would have had much impact on his decisions as his issues have not been resolved within him yet.
I agree with AJM, you had problems within your m before the MLC happened, so unless you address them and make peace with the past then you may carry them through to the future. Your h needs to address his own issues too and I wonder if he has acknowledge that he does have them yet, or if he is still wandering around MLC land thinking he is not the problem.
HaWho, I think your amazing; to have your h home and be working on your m takes great strength, patience and commitment. Keep moving forwards and working on yourself, your doing great.
