Hi Anna, I wouldn't beat yourself up about that. You're going to dinner with a friend...H can make of that what he will. If he snooped on your phone, thats up to him.

As for making advances in the morning. I understand you feeling disrespected. And I think this is where drawing the boundary is so important. Yes, your H may not be having S with OW (but of course we know that all cheaters lie). However, he is not being a good H just now. As Mvg has said. He is the babysitter. Would you ML with the babysitter?

What I wouldn't do is make anything about OW. But, I think it is fair to say to him. H - given the state of our M just now, I just don't feel like ML to you. And I would leave it at that.

Don't feel bad about it. Don't worry about it. The fact is, if your H were invested in you and in your M, you would enjoy ML to him. But he isn't just now. His attention is diverted with yukky OW...and so why would you want to ML to him on those terms? This part is about you and your own comfort/needs - not him...

Hope you are having a good weekend. xx

Last edited by Sotto; 09/05/15 10:06 PM.
T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus