H has started an affair

[Sotto]

Hi Anna, well done with the self control and not texting him. Yes, I agree with mvgfwd. From what I read, your H is thinking - Is she dating?? Well, maybe I'll feel better if she is too. But, who is this guy?? I don't like it!! etc.....

All of this is helpful I think. Confusion and interest from your H is no bad thing. From your part, I would never lie about what you are doing - just say something about going out with a friend. And if he pushes, you can say - yes, it's a male friend. All absolutely true.

If he says - is it a date. Don't reassure him that no you're not dating. But you could say - we're just going out for a friendly drink. And I certainly wouldn't mention that your friend is gay.

For my part, I've had some contact with mutual friends of H recently. I've been telling them about my new social group and how busy I've been. Made some new friends I've met outside of the social group too. I just haven't mentioned that the social group is female - I think it's best to be a little hazy about some things....

Enjoy your dinner out xx