She knows you were hurt by the EA, and Uncomfortable with the OM. Yet when you left, she chose to stay outside where HE was, not leave with you and honor your feelings.

Her ACTIONS showed you where her priorities lay, and they clearly are not with you or the marriage- her priority was to stay close to OM.

Time for your 180s . She is choosing a dangerous path. I am so sorry this is happening to your marriage.

Keep coming back to these forums, and read DR.

M: 48
H: 44
M: 2 / T: 7
My kids: S22, S18, S17, D12
H no kids of his own
BD: 7/12/2015 / moved out same day
Piecing 9/6/2015
Moved back in 10/2015