My Reader's Digest Version

[SParker]

The GAL will be difficult. I'm president of a business organization and now I've been kicked out of the business. I'm involved in many local things H is in as well.

I'm unsure how to relate this program exactly to my situation though. My H wants to work the marriage out, but needs time to heal and there is a huge two-side of the coin discrepancy going on. (I will not be discussing my side with him as this has only been destructive so far.) I guess I just need to get more 'big girl pants' to last me through empathizing with all his pain. I am in need of patience in large quantities.

Going dark for me would be counter-productive.
Not trying to meet his needs would be as well.

I was not terribly receptive to our M before he left. Many times lashing out in anger due to perceived injustices and hurt. H feels that although he needs space, he needs me to pursue the R with him.

I haven't got the ILYBNILWY notice yet... I was the one that had used that before, but never left or had EA/PA.

Maybe soon I will be cheery enough to GAL, but I'm not there yet. Most of my time is spent trying to figure out what to do about the one teetering on the brink of destruction and focusing on changing myself.

Anyway- I too feel the need to be right. I have read on here somewhere you can either be right or be happy. That made it easier for me to let go of.

The control thing- once we realize we aren't really in control of anything in the first place, everything belongs to and is in God's control, then trying to control can make us feel really stupid.

We miss our WASs because they are a part of us. It was meant to be that way. Hopefully, this is only a bad season that will pass and make us stronger when it's gone.

Thanks for the encouragement!
Keep your chin up!