WARNING, THIS POST IS GOING TO BE PRETTY HONEST AND STRAIGHTFORWARD ABOUT SEX. DON'T READ IT IF YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT.
Well, I just trolled, posted to a few other boards, let's see if we have any takers. I have received a few emails on this topic as well, with no more insight.
Renew, what you wrote was very candid, thank you. Twice now your candid posts have helped me.
Quote:
With your H, the question is why does he behave the way he does when ML with you. It does seem like he's holding back his feelings, holding back on being truly intimate. But why? I'm trying to imagine why. Is he trying to hold back feelings, or is he trying to recapture old feelings for you, or maybe he is so concerned about how you feel he's afraid to look, or maybe its just too intense for him right now? I'm not sure.
My gut feeling is that it is too intense for him, he is not ready to feel those emotions, he is hiding so that he doesn't feel it. However, perhaps he is just afraid of not feeling anything if he does look at me?
I really don't know why he is acting in this fashion.
What I really need to know is, can he do what he is (I think) trying to do? If he closes his eyes, each time we ML, does that mean he is able to effectively ward off any emotions? If he doesn't touch me (which he is starting to do, VERY slowly, every fifth or so time we ML) will he be able to hold those emotions at bay.
I know I can't control what he is feeling, but I want to know what he is doing. I want to know if it will work to do what he thinks it will.
As much of a tomboy as I have been, I still can't get that much into a guy's head. Does the physical act of penetration do it? Is it the orgasm, as you said, Renew? Is it the touching, kissing, looking into each other's eyes? Is it all of that? What about ML makes a man feel the most accepted and loved? I would think it would be the penetration, as I know that with oral sex, a man feels as if a woman who takes him into her mouth is "accepting" him. Some men view this as the ultimate act of love. So, it must be the "penetration" that does it? If so, then H is wasting his time by not touching me/looking at me. If it's everything, or the visual connection, or just a combination of things, then H is robbing me (in a sense) of the emotions he is feeling during ML.
OK, I didn't mean for it to sound like that. I know he has to come around when he is ready. I really am just trying to understand what is going on in his head and why he does these things.
