Just read your story and I'm sixth months finding about my H affair's and 5 months since I kicked him out. From my experience if you can keep co-habiting with him, do it. I know it is going to be hard for your sanity but if he is around it'd be a lot easier for you.
Like you I am impatient and wanted to fix everything. Unfortunately I kept pushing him away. I don't know if he is with OW, but when he comes round to see the kids he looks like a wreck. Could it be guilt or not? but I have learnt to detach from the situation now.
There is nothing we can do at the moment. If he really wanted to leave you, he'd have done it as this happened to one of my friend. Men don't leave their wives unless they are sure about the OW.
Good on you to look good and feel upbeat. I know it's hard, and you feel it is fake but believe me it'll soon become a second nature. Think about when you learnt to rid a bike, it didn't work straight away and at first you didn't feel comfortable, but little by little you managed to rid it a bit more. This is the same.
The first steps are the hardest, but once you are on this bike you appreciate the road and its surrounding. Gosh I hope it makes sense to you :-).
Never doubt your strength, it might not seem obvious but it is there.
