The court date is Nov 5. I am feeling anxiety about this. He wants to do it pro se, but I feel I need someone to look at the stuff. I found a mediator, now we need to contact with her.
. I'm by no means a lawyer. But I don't see any harm in you getting legal advice, whether through a mediator or your own L. You need to make sure to protect yourself.
That said, I wouldn't worry about the date. Being "divorced" doesn't change anything but the way you file your taxes. Won't change anything about the way you interact.
Originally Posted By: drpqb29
Because If the upcoming date, I found a great local resource for marriages in crisis and that does couple mentoring. They would do 8/10 sessions. I was hoping that H would give it a shot because what does he have to lose. We are already heading in that direction as well. We could work on mediation and mentoring until Nov 5. That was my thought process.
When I brought it up, H said that we are in different spots right now and that he doesn't understand why I keep doing this. I am making this all about me. I had ten years to figure out my issues for this marriage. I should be able to use my psychology degree for my issues (or something to that effect). He ask if this was about Sunday (when he invited me to dinner). I said no, it is about the last couple of weeks of being confused by his actions. I ask why he was inviting me to do things with him. He said he is alone with the kids most days and works from home, he is lonely. Sorry he was relying on me as a friend.
Unfortunately, this isn't surprising. I'm sure he sees this as you trying to work on your M. Just back off for now, I think.
Originally Posted By: drpqb29
As I am here crying like a fool, I said I can't be your friend right now. all that you do gives me hope and thinks you are feeling differently. I did say I want to be his wife not his friend. He said he knows.
That is basically how we ended the conversation.
I feel I have screwed up royally. I have read some of the boundaries thread. Is this a boundary issue?
Screw up? Yeah. So what? Learn from it and come back stronger. No problem with what you said at the end if you mean it. Just back off the pursuit, I think.
