Im sorry you are going through this it is test of your will your strenghts and every aspect of your feelings and emotions. Keep reading and trying to work what your learning into the situations that arise.
I would suggest validating his feelings that you were late stating you understand how that must have felt for him a reassure youll do better next time. Without using the word im sorry.
Actions speak louder than words so try to do what you can in replace of needing to be sorry. I can relate to what he saying here as ive said that to H before. My thought at the time was DONT need to be sorry about something and DO whatever it is that needs to be done correctly so you dont need to be sorry for it. Does that make sense? I see this more for repeated types of incidents not for singular occassions.
Another piece of advice im sure you've read.. put your game face on and shelve the attitude and emotions away to put your best foot forward when ever you see him. You can always break down later when by yourself.
I understand that by you being with him is difficult for you but he is saying he' s lonley. I see it as he could be looking to spend that time with someone else but he is reaching to you... just my thought. The other point of it though and im not clear by your post is he only seeking you out when the kids are involved or do you go out like a date just the two of you?
If he is seeking out togetherness with kids thats differnt in my opinion he wants help like a babysitter and no I wouldnt do that very often. He needs to see what its going to be like to have to do child rearing on his own. See what life without you there will really be like. An occassional family time if your going to do something really fun then yeah maybe.
If your invited and its just the two of you then I think I would muster up all my courage to go and be with him. Be fun light hearted and NO R talking. Dress to the nines and act as if you are the happiest most confidant woman in the world and smile ... fake it till you make it. And be the first to say I need to go now but this has been great , thank you.. leave him thinking youve got somewhere to be. Leave him wanting more.. advice here that ive been given on this forum ..
Good luck to you.. we are all pulling for you
Married 1991 D 32 GD 12 D 30 GD 3 S 29 M 58 S 57 1st bomb 2008 2nd bomb 4/2015 same person New bomb 09/24 I fear those big words which make us so unhappy.
