hold on!! - 12

[u-turn]

I want to stress V's advice on working through how to tell the kids with the IC. This is really, really good advice. The IC can not only work on how to approach the topic and what to say, but also prepare you for the likely reactions and tips for handling them.

It would be ideal if you can both tell them, and maybe the IC can figure out a way that this could be approached w/ your W from having heard you out longer. But, I doubt this is likely. She can help you both talk w/ your W when you drop your bomb to minimize W's reaction cause undue stress to the kids, and also what you might do w/ kids if that doesn't work.

A very stressful time, indeed. For everyone in your family. Just remember, you are doing your best. That is all you can do in a very bad situation. You'll do even better if you allow yourself to just do your best rather than worrying that you should be able to do better and what the consequences of not doing that are. You'll deal with that as it comes up.

Just like the R w/ your W isn't over, the R with your kids will have plenty of time and opportunity to help them heal and be happy.

Good luck! We're here for you.

Thank you Asitis - you offer great advice.
All I think I can do is take these things as they come (like you said). My IC is out of town for a couple weeks, I am on my own here (with exception of this amazing group of people - I am so grateful).

We will get through this - thank you