Time to make changes

[joss]

Thanks for your kind response uRworthy. It was timely as I am having a couple of off-days. Have been very down thinking how alone I feel at times, and how bleak the future looks without complete family. I know H is not having any kind of fun, despite still being with OW. He told me 3 years ago that wherenver he's with her he's reminded cr$p life has become. Pity he didn't think to change it.

I am trying to get a life, make plans and get involved in things. I have plans tonight and over the weekend. I am trying to fit a lot in before the kids get back from MILs next Tue.then it's back to school for the 3 of them. That'll leave plenty of time to ruminate!

it gives the best chance of saving a marriage.

I think this is especially true for me. In the past 2 weeks of being on my own, I have done a lot of thinking and I realise we haven't done anything as a couple since the kids were born. It's no wonder we are in this mess. WE have never had family local to babysit and because our middle child is slightly autistic, I have never wanted a 'babysitters' to sit him. I would never be able to relax.

How do you spend your time outside work? What makes you happy now you have time to yourself?

You chose to stay home and raise your children. To me, there is no greater or more important job than that.

I completely agree with you. But I did lose my identity. That's not good. I am trying to get it back now by doing things I really enjoy.

So, tuck your marriage safely away in a box for now. He needs to figure himself out and you need to let him. It’s the only way he will get through this.

Thank you for your lovely kind words uRworthy. It means a lot.

Can I ask if you are still open to reconciliation if the time came? or has there been too much water under the bridge?

Happiness to you.

Joss