Afraid it's too late....

[SPD72]

As for the balance between great dad and not being used by WAS..IT'S HARD MAN.

I try to see my kids daily...I don't see them if I have to work or if W made plans ..but we talk daily..

I got a second job, so that I can meet all my obligations ..and that makes it doubly hard..to answer your question Azzork I've always gone to every practice, it's not something I started since BD... I don't want to change my interactions with my kids because of the problems with W.

Unfortunately, your relationship IS going to change, at least somewhat. So it's time to prioritize.

Am I angry that she's using me as a babysitter so she can go and do whatever? Should I even care..?

It depends what your goals are. Is it to be married to her again?

**I honestly don't know if I want to be with her anymore..the level of vitriol and historical revision not to mention her complete lack of accountability..her family's incessant undermining and whisper campaign...and her pollyanna disneyesque vision of relationships has at times driven me to think "good riddance to bad rubbish".

Her I was the "perfect wife" and "one day you'll regret me leaving" and " I'm in hell (at her mothers) and you put me here " speeches makes me seethe...

Before i came here i responded to all that fire for fire..I'm human..I just wabt to be treated fairly...my LDAs were 8 yrs ago..I did everyting she asked..when i tried to explain that thetr was no excuse for the choice i made it wasnt made in a vaccum...I was denounced as repulsive and lacking in character.
I know this is just the anger /ego phase, but it is also an honest reflection.

I am no saint I fully owned up to my shortcomings and fears. I was adopted, adopted family became blended..ADULTS made my early years horrendous..I researched my biologicals..found them nasically told "I dont want you messing up the life i have built" so i have a few issues regarding family dynamics.
***

If so, you may need to shift HOW you parent. You should not sacrifice being a great dad. But you may need to re-examine what it means to be a great dad.

***Can you explain further..due to my own experiences as a child I was always fully involved with my kids as I wanted them to know baring something drastic I WOULD BE THERE..***