The W told her story ... could have very well been me up there, so similar. Right down to her sharing her feelings of how she felt getting tested for STD's, in a way verbalizing some pain I have been feeling and could not put words to. Was a seriously intense session. How she came to terms with the A, all the hurt, the triggers after ... along with the H expressing all he then had to do for the h3ll he put her through, all the work it takes, and how backslides happen and what one can do.
Wow. I think that would have been a good talk to hear. How did she describe the feelings related to STD testing? I am going this week... I've put it off for a long time and am even questioning whether it is needed after all this time & no symptoms? Not sure if that is logical or me trying to find an excuse not to do it. Ugh. But if relations were in January & it is now August...
I think you're doing an amazing job at all this. I understand the feelings of questioning whether or not she can be the spouse you want & if it is the marriage you want. I think all the things that come up create these feelings as well as the trust issue. I've been having periods of this too. Thinking- wouldn't it be easier to start over new with someone who wouldn't put me through this? Someone I don't have these triggers with? But in the end, it wouldn't be easier... just different. And then there are the kids to consider as well.
I hope you guys have a great vacation & that your w does get to go. Our vacation really did wonders for us in regards to connecting w/o the stressors of life and for giving us a lot of time together to enjoy one another.
T: 14 M: 12 D: 9 S: 6 BD: 2/18/15 (H affair) Working on marriage: 3/12/15-6/11/15 Broken Trust (my error): 6/11/15 H ring off: 7/6/15; Comm w/ OW confirmed 7/13/15 H wants to work on fixing things: 7/21/15
