Shotgun I never have the chance to say thank you for supporting me and offering me wise advice during that "interesting" period.
Can I just chip in regarding your W during your cancer. It is my dad who had it (leukaemia) and he needed two transplants. My mum was beside herself all the way through, and to a certain extent is. She would argue with him, and made his life not pleasant. To me she didn't know how to deal with it. We were so close losing him and she had conflicted feelings. She also felt hopeless because it was something that she couldn't control or help with.
Maybe this is what your wife felt as she didn't know how to help you, how to offer you support, and at the same time deal with her own feelings. I don't agree with being involved with someone else, but to a certain extent I can understand that she might have needed someone to talk to and to listen to her.
I know she is putting throught a lot, but try to see her views. How would you have felt if it had been her? How would you have been able to support her? What would have been your reactions when it was treatment time? Wouldn't have you been scared and lost? You both had a lot to deal with.
Keep looking after yourself and keep PMA. There is a light at the end if this tunnel. People think I'm crazy but I do believe that things (bad or good) happens to us for a reason. I wouldn't have thought like that few months ago though :-)!
