How do I get past that? And is she even capable of the work it would require to fix herself? I'm taking it day by day but starting to imagine myself more often with someone new; someone with no sorted history of betrayal.
I am not sure, but I do know its not from another woman, the bottom of a bottle or from a pill .... its from alot of work, tons of time, and a belief in yourself. What happened to you will have to be processed, you will carry this with you in your M, or in any relationship you have ... its not something you can just drop off and disregard. This is why you have to rebuild you, keep working on yourself ... let things play out as they will.
Thanks Cali. I needed to hear from someone with a solid outside perspective. It's hard when you keep hearing from every single one of your friends, and most of your family, that you need to let go, file, and get on with your life. Plenty of encouragement to date, and even a couple of offers to set me up. I think they all believe that the way to move on is to find another woman. I know it's not the answer and have resisted the temptation up to this point, but the loneliness wears on me, and I'm still struggling with rejection and low self-esteem.
I believe that you're right though. I need to keep working on myself, get to the point I am OK with being alone, and as far over WW as I can possibly get. Maybe not completely over her, as I'm not sure that day will ever come, but enough that I can realistically commit to another R. Otherwise, I'm no better than her - trying to slap a band-aid over a gushing emotional wound, and using whatever pour soul happens to come into my path to make me feel better, however temporary that may be. Thanks for the reality check.
Me 47 W 42 T 24 yrs M 18 yrs W living with OM BD1: 3/7/2015 (A with OM#1) BD2: 4/11/2015 (A with OM#2, W moves out) WW filed for D, papers received 9/18/2015. Meeting to determine child custody 9/29/2015.
