That is a good suggestion. I also liked how you said that these were boundaries for both of you guys... I think that is a helpful point to make when I do have that conversation. It isn't about punishing him for what he has done, it is about protecting our marriage on both sides.
I feel like he is 100% committed but I am a bit leery on relationship talks related to OW as I have ruined a bunch of those conversations by getting myself too worked up & accusing him of things. So I think I have to work on myself a bit more to be sure I am approaching it in a healthy way and that I am doing so for the right reasons (like you said, not for control). I think I will use the book His Needs, Her Needs to open up that conversation... he read a bit of it while we were on vacation & the need for feeling safe & secure is a big one for me. Also how the book talks about how letting someone else outside of the marriage receive intimate conversation takes away from what you could be putting into your spouse's love bank. This is a big reason why we should not be having members of the opposite sex as close friends or someone we share intimate details of our life with... it takes away from the marriage & creates the potential for affair. But how to say all this without lecturing or going on & on is what I need to figure out!
T: 14 M: 12 D: 9 S: 6 BD: 2/18/15 (H affair) Working on marriage: 3/12/15-6/11/15 Broken Trust (my error): 6/11/15 H ring off: 7/6/15; Comm w/ OW confirmed 7/13/15 H wants to work on fixing things: 7/21/15
