Tkd - Breathe. We all make mistakes. Nobody here is perfect. A lot of this is so counter intuitive that it's easy to react to something in a completely non-DB way.
You said this
Originally Posted By: tkdmme
Again, maybe I'm wrong but I'm tired of being painted as someone I was not.
I think this sentence is a lot of your problem.
1) you can't control her or the people she's talking to. They are going to say and believe whatever they want. Your W may tell you that you have a horn coming out of your forehead. If that's what she sees, then to her, it's real, even if every single other person knows there is no horn. If she believes it, then to her, it's true.
2) you have to get out of her head. There's no defending yourself. There's no being "right" here. It's not about that anymore. It's not that you give her everything she wants, but it's about picking battles. If there's something you know you can't win, what's the point in fighting about it?
3) this process is LONG. You've been here what, 6 weeks? You've been married what, 15 YEARS? You're not going to fix a problem that's taken that long to build in a few days. This is a months long process - I've heard maybe a month per year of marriage. Things are likely going to get a LOT worse before they get better. You better thicken your skin a little.
