Hmmm .... I just do not know. I read this last night on the way to softball and thought at first might be a good idea but just had a vibe that would be me pushing .... figured I would give it some thought.
Well ... went to my GAL, had a good time ... went 4-4 3 doubles and we won 21-2, so yeah I had a blast. Hung out talking ball for a bit then came home. Just got the bike in the garage and the phone rang, W .. all up my junk about where I was ... I was unaware there was a curfew imposed nor did I think I was 'that' late ... (9:15, game ended at 8:30) I come in and she starts up and I thought 'Hello Monster, its been awhile so glad you could visit' .... she starts in on me about a number of things, I listened for a bit until I heard "You are out there doing your thing on that Motorcycle I do not approve of .." I stopped her pretty quickly with an "Excuse me? I do not need your approval for the motorcycle" she side stepped that and dodged it like that movie the Matrix. I quickly jumped into my spew jacket like a seasoned Marine in a foxhole. She went on about a few things, all over the place like she was searching for those buttons that have been removed. Then she threw the book at me, literally .. the book "after the Affair" that just came in the mail. Told me .. "Here take this I do not need it thrown in my face every single second" I took the book and placed it on the table where my keys are face down ... told her I was going out to walk the dog.
It hit me ... PMS time. I came back , jumped in the shower, grabbed a couple pillows, said goodnight and slept on the couch.
Woke up this morning and more Monster from her, I engaged here and there with some truth darts. She was telling me how hard she was 'trying' and went to her go-to "We are Oil and Water" ... mind you Oil and water for 25 years now. I listened for a bit, STFU ... validated .. but did get to a point truth darts were in order, darts about her preaching positivity but she has been pretty negative all week, saying she is committed to the marriage but on social media she poses as she is single ( Yes I brought up FB) .... she fired back that I am not wearing my ring and that I lost it or threw it away like I did our M (I almost laughed aloud here), I pointed to where it was and reminded her that it was here who said she was 'not there' and 'not ready' and then stamped it with something we learned in Retrouvaille with a "You seem to still want to live a single-married life and that is your choice, not something I want nor chose to do" ... she ramped up a bit and brought up the A, I calmly stated .. "again, that was a choice you made, not me" Then she brought up sex ... and our issues there and implied things about the A and OM, I told her she was free to make that choice again if she chose again ... then ended the conversation (That button is still firmly available)
I left pretty calm, and honestly felt ok with not taking bait, not yelling nor getting upset ... I hinted to her that when she PMSs she looks for a fight (She told me in the past she did this with OM .... even wanted my advice at the time .. ummm yeah-NO) She called later .. calmer ... and confessed she thinks she might be PMSing, she has no control (I did not agree here and think she uses this as an excuse to be verbally abusive, something I did not allow her to do this time) ... I cut the call short and said I needed to get back to work.
Ugh ... hope it blows by for the weekend but I have a feeling I need to clean off that spew jacket.
